we write this sitting in the kitchen sink. it was the best of times, it was the worst of times. gentlemen, cock your pistols! call me ishmael. rosebud.

but we digress. 

the chiefs are a kick and ass duo who score a combined 14.5 out of 10 on the bombshell scale. friends since infancy and until one of us dies in a horrific sidecar mishap--people are always asking us if we know tyler durden. in third grade, our alter egos were news reporters aptly named truly boring and barb wire. this blog enables us to tap into that third grade genius once again and share it with you, kind reader.

for now, we believe this is all you need to know about us--other than that THE HUNTER is the heart and soul of america and EL CAPITÁN has recently developed a knack for calling people (and fake foliage) on their bullshit.

our favorite words include nougat, boosh, and futon. you can decide what a boosh is.


MOTHER SUPERIOR-- she's back in the habit.

smart as a whip and holier than thou, MOTHER SUPERIOR (in no way related to the lake) makes it her business to inform herself and you, kind reader, about human concerns and global injustice. reporting from around the world, this mother knows what's up and makes it her job to do something about it. in her free time, MOTHER SUPERIOR enjoys making lavender sachets and perfecting her toeside frontside 180 .

MISS LUSCIOUS-- one balenciaga away from a breakdown.

when she's not making fashion collages from old issues of vogue, MISS LUSCIOUS is tracking down the latest and greatest fashion finds of the season. her mission for you, kind reader: less uggs, more frye. if you don't know what that means, it's her duty to inform you (after she takes a louboutin to your eyeball).

HOWIE DEWITT-- this is howie dewitt.

known for both literally and figuratively throwing caution to the wind, HOWIE DEWITT finds joy in the random and even the asinine. this grab-bag attitude did not serve him well in grade school, however, when one show and tell left his teacher and three of his classmates with (minor) ear drum injuries and a pair of shattered spectacles. now he writes for us.